Monday, February 20, 2012

What if...

    I'm sure all of us have done it. You know..."When I grow up, I want to be..." But for the most part, none of us were very realistic about it.

    I, on the other hand, had it all figured out.

    I wanted to be Beaker.

    You remember Beaker. From the Muppet Show. There was a good reason for it, too. Was I the only one that noticed it? Beaker would be helping out in the lab, and he would end up getting blown up. KABOOM!! But every week he would show back up, ready for another episode. In my mind, that was close to immortality. No burn marks from the previous episode. No parasites still clinging to him. What a guy! Everything would be back to normal by the next week.

    But then I grew up (as most of us do). And I knew I was just being immature. How ridiculous! A muppet? I had my sights set on the ideal person. The perfect character. I was no longer 12!

    I now wanted to be Worf from Star Trek.

    Think about it. Warrior. The ultimate man...ahem...Klingon. A strong heritage. Family was important to him. And he would display a surprising demonstration of mercy at times. Loyal to the captain to a fault.

    But what if...

    What if I could morf Beaker with Worf? I wouldn't want to have Worf's physical appearance with Beaker's character. Can you imagine a security office running around a starship going, "Meeneemeeneemeeneemeeneemeeneee" in a high-shrill voice? Who would take him seriously? How unrealistic! But no...I would want Beaker's body with Worf's character. A wonderful diverse heritage (Klingon and muppet). All my enemies would underestimate me. And if I got blown up, I would be back next week!

    So that's it. I want to be Worf as a muppet. There!

    Wait a minute...there's Gene Simmons. What if...

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